Since a relationship is a give and take between two people it is important to realize that you can’t give what you don’t have. This means that if you are unhappy or unsatisfied you won’t have a happy or satisfying relationship! So before you go tromping off into a relationship you need to work on yourself first else your relationship is destined for failure.
Some of the first things you need to do to ensure your wellbeing before going into a relationship are; first promise yourself that no matter how the relationship ends up, you will be ok, and second lead a fulfilling life. Now these may sound somewhat simple but they are crucial to ensuring your happiness and the success of a relationship.
As stated earlier you need to make sure that you will be okay even if the relationship ends. This means that you are only happy when your partner is around and you absolutely need them, then you will come off as fearful, powerless, and weak – something that will make your partner not even want to be in a relationship with you for two reasons:
1. You are needy and dependent – when someone is seen as needy many people want to completely avoid them because they will always want more and your partner may feel that you will become too demanding and need too much attention than they can give.
2. Burden – when you become so completely dependent on a person and a relationship you will be a burden and the other person will feel completely responsible for their happiness because, let’s face it, they are! They will likely begin to resent this and your relationship will begin to take a toll for the worse.
Next you need to make sure that you are living a fulfilling life and that you can have fun outside of a relationship. Rather than waiting for you and your partner to always do something, go out with friends, family, or even a community group or perhaps going back to school and learning something new too!
Being completely dependent on your partner to do something and have fun will make you seem needy and we already discussed how that makes you seem like an unattractive partner and someone who is a burden. This is why being active, having fun, and living a fulfilling life is essential – because when you do all of these things your relationship will be something that completely accents your life rather than consumes it!