Abuse is common in relationships and can occur between both people. Whether it’s physical, mental, or even economic, domestic abuse is prolific in various cultures and is often the men who are the abusers. Knowing more about abuse, and what to do in an abusive relationship is crucial because it can save someone else’s life and even your own.
If you are being abused or have been abused previously you need to know that you are NOT helpless. The situation is NOT your fault no matter how many times you are told that, and you need to realize that if you stay in that relationship the abuse won’t stop – in fact it often gets worse!
Unfortunately for most women relationships don’t start out abusive so when the abuse does start they are often torn between their strong feelings and doing the right thing.
To protect yourself from being in an abusive relationships you can watch for these warning signs below (note that these are not all of the warning signs and if your significant other does display them that doesn’t mean that they will become abusive):
- If you are afraid of his temper or agree with him just to avoid him getting mad
- If he is jealous or doesn’t want you spending time with your friends and family
- If you are threatened with violence or even physically hit/kicked/pushed
- If your partner constantly keeps track of your location
So how do get out of an abusive relationship? First, you need to be ready to leave, then you need to have a safety plan in place. When you are preparing to leave an abusive relationship you need to make sure you have a record of the abuse (pictures, police reports, ER records, and even a written journal). You also need to make sure that you and your children will have somewhere to go with some food and clothing as well. Trusting a friend or a family member with money, clothing, papers, and other essentials will enable you and your children to have a much easier escape.
What do you do when you decide to leave? Since you have everything important stored at a friend or family member’s house you can then leave when you are ready. It is much safer to have a police officer there moderating the situation to ensure nothing happens however invite a friend or family member over to help – your abuser will likely refrain from hurting you when others are around!